The Grapevine

Entry 7 from my 8th night on vacation. Oooooops! I missed yesterdays log entry. Oh well, for my punishment I have to leave paradise and fly back to Chicago. No big deal in June or July when the weather is actually more pleasant in Chicago, but this is January and there is a cold front invading the Midwest as we speak. The cold front is supposed to be with -35 wind chill type winds, and it is coming from the Great White North. God Bless Canada!

So what is tonight's blog about? I thought long and hard about that. I could write my piece on "Kids", or "Drinks" or "Sidework" or "Tip share". I could write another tale of absolute rudeness and swine-like behavior from some of our "guests". I dunno..... I think I'll keep it light tonight. I think I'll write a bit about "The Grapevine". This is especially fitting because I am on vacation, and yet I am just about up to speed on all the gossip and goings on at The Fire.

There is nothing in the world that travels faster than gossip at a restaurant. All of the employees are fascinated with any shred of a scoop about their co-workers wrongdoings or shortcomings. I guess you could call it a human nature kind of curiosity. Who got fired? Who is pregnant? Who just got ANOTHER DWI? The juicy news travels faster than a California wild fire.

The mediums are plenty. Number one is word-of-mouth. You see a manager talk to a server about a customer complaint and you tell Shirley, who tells Donna, who tells Tony, who tells Alphonso..... Don't have all of the details? IT DOESN'T MATTER!

"Why is the manager talking to John?".
"I don't know. I heard he had a customer complaint."
"About what?"
"I heard it took him 10 minutes to get back with a table's drink order....."
"Who was at the bar last night?"
"Amanda."
"Shit. She was in a piss-poor mood all night. John's lucky he got his drinks at all!"

And so on..... In addition to word-of-mouth, we have a lot of technical means to spread the messages. Cell phones and text messages are a plenty at the restaurant. The internet gives us My Space, Facebook and those wonderful blogs! As I previously mentioned, I am on vacation down in Florida. I had 3 Facebook messages telling me that one of the long time servers had gotten 86'd (waiter jargon for "fired" or when a food item is no longer on the menu). I also got wind that one of the restaurant couples had broken up, and that we might be getting a new manager.

Like the song's title, you can imagine that Dirty Laundry travels at an exceptionally fast speed (like TWICE the speed of light!). Somebody get fired? Somebody's kid got kicked out of high school? Somebody blatantly cheating on their spouse? Within moments it is common knowledge by all the staff at the restaurant. Within 20 minutes it has been text messaged to people not even working that day. Strange how we all have this preoccupation with everybody else's business, but we do.

Now I have to go pack and get ready to go to the winter wonderland in the Midwest. I wish I could stay another day or two, but then the stories would start at work about me quitting, or getting arrested or being forced into some religious cult......